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Interview at Infosys [Joke ]

40 posts · originally from https://geek.digit.in/community/threads/interview-at-infosys-joke.60538/

DigitalImmigrant
DigitalImmigrant Original post #1
Jun 16, 2007 at 10:50 AM
Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

Candidate: I am Kondesh Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!

Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it. What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly in 12th. I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I cannot invest so much of money". (The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.

Candidate : Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know , these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments..It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.

Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.

Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when I flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative ..

Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?

Candidate: He he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!:D

Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?

Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)

Interviewer: And which languages have you used?

Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.:D

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!:D

Interviewer : Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

Candidate : Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

Interviewer: What is your general project experience?

Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they are in pipeline!

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?

Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.

Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?

Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers', 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM', 'quality', 'versioncontrol', 'deadlines', 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!:D

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?

Candidate: Not much.

1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.

2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.

3. I believe in flexi-timings.

4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.

5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.

6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . But considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007,I don't mind going there in that period . As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?

Interviewer: He he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. :)) We look forward to working with you .. welcome to Infosys :)
M
medigit #2
Jun 16, 2007 at 12:01 PM
is this real....
sachin_kothari
Jun 16, 2007 at 12:08 PM
i got this email 2 years back.
dont know if its true. :D
fun2sh
fun2sh #4
Jun 16, 2007 at 12:16 PM
my gaaaaaaaaaaaawd if its true THEN MAIN BE PADH KAR KYA KARUNGA. ISE TO AISE HI NAUKARI MIL GAYI AUR MAIN YAHAN ENGG ME ROJ APAN DIMAG KHAPATA HUN. :mrgreen:
BBThumbHealer
Jun 16, 2007 at 1:08 PM
overall gud but this seemed strange ...

DigitalImmigrant said:
Interviewer: He he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. :)) We look forward to working with you .. welcome to Infosys :)

how can they do this ?? :confused: :eek: :razz:

fun2sh said:
my gaaaaaaaaaaaawd if its true THEN MAIN BE PADH KAR KYA KARUNGA. ISE TO AISE HI NAUKARI MIL GAYI AUR MAIN YAHAN ENGG ME ROJ APAN DIMAG KHAPATA HUN. :mrgreen:

then y don't u go ahead ? :D .... make this man ur idol ! :))
sachin_kothari
Jun 16, 2007 at 1:10 PM
^^ first need to check if its true.
and if it is i am also in the line :D
Quiz_Master
Jun 16, 2007 at 1:18 PM
It can't be real.
But ofcourse its hilarious.

"Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!"

And this one

"Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!"
_____________
Actuallly every sinhle bit was hilarious. Amazing. U made my day.
Lucky_star
Jun 16, 2007 at 1:19 PM
ROFL :D:D:D

medigit said:
is this real....
Infosys has more than 70,000 people working worldwide. If they take people like this, then soon it will be the global leader in IT.:p

If Infy ever asked questions like this, then no student would ever think of anythng else.:-o
i_am_crack
Jun 16, 2007 at 2:34 PM
Kool to read on saturday...
vish786
vish786 #10
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:31 PM
is this stuff real... @author of this thread :D
Apollo
Apollo #11
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:33 PM
BlackBerry7100g said:
how can they do this ?? :confused: :eek: :razz:
Last year, an undergrad-engineer friend of mine was picked up by TCS via campus recruitments. He had listed studying the share market as one of his hobbies under his resume, and the only question he was asked in the PI was to state the previous day's share price of TCS. He got the job.
iMav
iMav #12
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:36 PM
BlackBerry7100g said:
how can they do this ??
if this was campus recruitment i am not surprised that the guy was hired coz as it is first 2 years they make u do nothing and ur just having fun and some time spent on training other than that its all time pass no work at infy and tcs :)
Lucky_star
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:39 PM
iMav said:
if this was campus recruitment i am not surprised that the guy was hired coz as it is first 2 years they make u do nothing and ur just having fun and some time spent on training other than that its all time pass no work at infy and tcs :)
Who said you that?
iMav
iMav #14
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:46 PM
every 1 of my friends who have been employed there last year and the yr before that

and all my cousin's friend who got recruited there last year and before that ;)
Lucky_star
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:50 PM
^^^Is it? Yippppeeee
Actually I got selected in Tcs this year, and as far as I know, the job is somwhat difficult for the first 2 years, as they make freshers to do heavy job.
iMav, thanks for the info you gave:rolleyes:
iMav
iMav #16
Jun 16, 2007 at 3:54 PM
man my aggregate wasnt sufficient so wasnt eligible but from what every 1has told me that the first 2 years of training are fun but if theres some project that springs up they might turn towards u but infy toh im sure its fun tcs only 2 guys have given me feedback ... infy bahut log hain
S
sandeepk #17
Jun 16, 2007 at 4:40 PM
This one is old but still good!!!
praka123
praka123 #18
Jun 16, 2007 at 6:28 PM
Isnt this the reason one man some "subramanya" got ditched off from Infy.i remember reading "skit" made by this infosys employee criticizing how infy newbies waiting for job there as "benchies" :D
aryayush
aryayush #19
Jun 16, 2007 at 6:58 PM
Why are so many people wondering whether this is real or not! Do you need someone to confirm it to you that it is just a (very poor) joke! :lol:
Pathik
Pathik #20
Jun 16, 2007 at 7:01 PM
^^ if that s the case then i am ready to confirm it :D ... Its a poor joke... :p
Tech.Masti
Jun 16, 2007 at 7:38 PM
^^ yah ,Its just a joke :)
praka123
praka123 #22
Jun 16, 2007 at 8:24 PM
but then why these companies taking B.Sc grads too even from normal colleges for eg; in kerala. :?
iMav
iMav #23
Jun 16, 2007 at 8:55 PM
well the main reason for companies like tcs and infy for hiring 10k+ recruits every yr is so tht they do not have man shortage which is considered to be the biggest road block for any company .... now things have changed skilled man power available is scarce hence these ppl recruit any 1 ....

extc engg are hired by tcs and infy wat more can 1 say .... besides everything tht u r supposed to do thr u r trained for so its no big deal for them

now these guys know tht out of 10k+ a lot will leave so the next yr agan 10k+
Quiz_Master
Jun 16, 2007 at 8:57 PM
A little offtopic but I found this in my mail. Really Funny.


Why student fails in exam???????

It's not the fault of the student if he/she fails, Because the year has an 'ONLY 365' days.

Typical academic year for a student.

1. Sundays- 52,Sundays in a year, which are rest days. Balance 313 days.

2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study. Balance 263 days.

3. 8 hours daily sleep-means 122 days. Balance 141 days.

4. 1 hour for daily playing-(good for health) means 15 days. Balance 126 days.

5. Two hours daily for food & other delicacies (chew properly & eat)-means 30days. Balance 96 days.

6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days . Balance 81 days.

7. Exam days per year at least 35 days. Balance 46 days.

8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival holidays)-40 days. Balance 6 days.

9. For sickness at least 3 days. Balance 3 days.

10. Movies and functions at least 2 days. Balance 1 day.

11. That 1 day is your birthday.

"How can a student pass????"
Tech.Masti
Jun 17, 2007 at 1:58 AM
^^^
already posted here sometime before, but yes its really funny :lol:
fun2sh
fun2sh #26
Jun 17, 2007 at 2:30 PM
every1 knows its a poor joke but its more fun in belivin it to be real :mrgreen:
blueshift
blueshift #27
Jun 17, 2007 at 11:21 PM
Good one. lol
ashu888ashu888
Mar 5, 2008 at 12:03 AM
Awesome dude, forget abt its identity being real or fake, I loved it :D:D

Edit: im a 4th year I.T Engg Student, from Mumbai :D:D

Cheers n e-peace..
NucleusKore
Mar 5, 2008 at 7:03 AM
I thought the training period was for six months and not two years
Faun
Faun #30
Mar 5, 2008 at 9:23 AM
now infy can kick u out within first 12 months, thats wat call letter says in my college
::cyborg::
Mar 5, 2008 at 10:09 AM
in our college campus recruitment HR was beaten by my friend a sikh jat guy of my class because the HR said that what do u do if i was found hving sex with ur mother

hr was beaten so badly that his nose was bleeding and he my friend was abusing him so badly

:D LOLZ
esumitkumar
Mar 5, 2008 at 10:19 AM
lemme clear all of ur doubts ..(been two yrs in Infy and now Im in TCS) :

** that above was a JOKE..good one :)

** that bench part is true but u shud pursue ur HR to give some project ...he/she will definitely give

** that subramaniam part is true ..he was fired as he was making mockery of infy ad recruiting campaign...

** Infy training is one of the hardest in industry..for non comp engg graduates trng is 3.5 mnths..for comp engg its 1.5 mnths ...they teach u everything frm C,oracle,java,unix etc..thr r regular online tests(every two days) n projects..to pass u have to get 65 out of 100 else u r thrown out..so its not a joke ..njoying n masti in TRNG !

** as told by my TCS frnz, TCS fresher trng is somewhat easier..no online tests..no throwing out..2 mnths full masti fr everyone ...

** they r taking Bsc graduates cuz industry is facing shortage of good ppl..have u ever read in ET ..over 70% of engg graduates r unemployable ...also Bsc ppl will take less salary than enggs ...so ...

I guess that clear all the doubts
raksrules
raksrules #34
Mar 5, 2008 at 12:29 PM
lemme clear all of ur doubts ..(been two yrs in Infy and now Im in TCS) :

** that above was a JOKE..good one :)

** that bench part is true but u shud pursue ur HR to give some project ...he/she will definitely give

** that subramaniam part is true ..he was fired as he was making mockery of infy ad recruiting campaign...

** Infy training is one of the hardest in industry..for non comp engg graduates trng is 3.5 mnths..for comp engg its 1.5 mnths ...they teach u everything frm C,oracle,java,unix etc..thr r regular online tests(every two days) n projects..to pass u have to get 65 out of 100 else u r thrown out..so its not a joke ..njoying n masti in TRNG !

** as told by my TCS frnz, TCS fresher trng is somewhat easier..no online tests..no throwing out..2 mnths full masti fr everyone ...

** they r taking Bsc graduates cuz industry is facing shortage of good ppl..have u ever read in ET ..over 70% of engg graduates r unemployable ...also Bsc ppl will take less salary than enggs ...so ...

I guess that clear all the doubts

+1 (In Infy for last 2.5 Years)
Yes the training is class apart.
The Campus awesome.
Before being thrown out they will give you sufficient time and tests to save yourselves.
The training for a IT/CS/CE student is about 2 months and for a Non-IT/CS/CE students its 4 months.
Bsc people are being recruited by Infy but they are at a lower level than engg graduates. They are Junior Software Engineers and need to clear a tough test before being promoted to Software Engineer Role.
G
genxguy #35
Mar 5, 2008 at 1:25 PM
Awesome :D
Rahim
Rahim #36
Mar 5, 2008 at 3:44 PM
Interviewer: And which languages have you used?

Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.:D
This line takes my goat:D
nileshgr
nileshgr #38
Mar 6, 2008 at 4:24 PM
overall gud but this seemed strange ...



how can they do this ?? :confused: :eek: :razz:



then y don't u go ahead ? :D .... make this man ur idol ! :))
They do this. There is another joke like this.

Interviewer(I): What brought you here ?
Candidate(C): The 10 O'Clock Train

I: What games do you play ?
C: Football

I: What do you mean by corner kick ?
C: A kick from the corner

I: Haha. With whom do you play ?
C: My children.

I: hhahaahahohoo. You have been selected!

The above one is true. It happened in the south when my GrandFather was working!

overall gud but this seemed strange ...



how can they do this ?? :confused: :eek: :razz:



then y don't u go ahead ? :D .... make this man ur idol ! :))
They do this. There is another joke like this.

Interviewer(I): What brought you here ?
Candidate(C): The 10 O'Clock Train

I: What games do you play ?
C: Football

I: What do you mean by corner kick ?
C: A kick from the corner

I: Haha. With whom do you play ?
C: My children.

I: hhahaahahohoo. You have been selected!
The above one is true. It happened in the south when my GrandFather was working!
praka123
praka123 #39
Mar 6, 2008 at 4:26 PM
does any IT company offers pension?
afaik Infosys gives.though u have to work there for 3 yrs or so. :-| correct me ,If I am wrong :)
__Virus__
__Virus__ #40
Mar 6, 2008 at 5:26 PM
Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages

Hahahahaha