What's the biggest lie, that you ever heard?

[IMGG]*funlava.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/tumblr_lprqsueMFf1qjms8xo1_400.png[/IMGG]

Some can be witty, some can be irritating, some can be innocent, some can be motivating, some can be selfish and some can be lovely.
Share the lies that you've heard here . . . :mrgreen:

God/Religion :grin:

God.
God created us

Wow. Gotta say, I'm surprised to say that even the 3rd reply (this one) is "GOD / RELIGION". Hattrick !

Windows is checking for a solution to the problem…

Customer care rep: You're our most previleged customer, and this plan is specially for you. :lol:

"I will return the money"..

" If India is a computer, Congress is its default programme.” - Guess who

[IMGG]*qph.is.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-2ed83beaf4d09bb9033dfa21bcbf0069[/IMGG]

+1 to post 2, 3 and 4

"I always tell the truth/I never lie"
*1.bp.blogspot.com/-ynfzjj7yAUU/T3B-1-kz4rI/AAAAAAAAB-w/pXfxOd9KK5M/s200/true+story.jpg

G

When i was small, my friend told kissing a girl can get her pregnant.

gopi_vbboy said:
When i was small, my friend told kissing a girl can get her pregnant.

Along the same lines, in Class 6, one of my friends claimed that inter-species sex could lead to human-animal hybrid species :facepalm:

When I was in 10th: "Study for boards.. after that you can watch TV as much as you want."
When I reached 11th: "Study till 12th.. after that life will get easy, and you can party as much as you like it."
When I was in College: "Study till graduation.. after that you are free to do whatever you want."
When I was doing Post Graduation: "Study hard.. life will be a bed of roses if you keep studying and get good marks"

What was the truth in all the cases?
Babaji ka Thullu.

Vyom said:
When I was in 10th: "Study for boards.. after that you can watch TV as much as you want."
When I reached 11th: "Study till 12th.. after that life will get easy, and you can party as much as you like it."
When I was in College: "Study till graduation.. after that you are free to do whatever you want."
When I was doing Post Graduation: "Study hard.. life will be a bed of roses if you keep studying and get good marks"

What was the truth in all the cases?
Babaji ka Thullu.

This takes the cake :lol:

Inb4 some Idli-Dosa guy asks the meaning of
Babaji ka Thullu.

S

Vyom said:
When I was in 10th: "Study for boards.. after that you can watch TV as much as you want."
When I reached 11th: "Study till 12th.. after that life will get easy, and you can party as much as you like it."
When I was in College: "Study till graduation.. after that you are free to do whatever you want."
When I was doing Post Graduation: "Study hard.. life will be a bed of roses if you keep studying and get good marks"

What was the truth in all the cases?
Babaji ka Thullu.

Holy fck i was told the same ****.

N

CommanderShawnzer said:
God/Religion

+infinity.

^lol !! the most common one ever !! Even i was a victim of this..

*www.onsecrethunt.com/wallpaper/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Baba-Ji-Ka-Thullu.jpg

"I agree that I am above 18 , before I was 18." - I don't feel a need to explain this statement.

"From Girls : " Mera koi boyfriend nahi hain.!

" lol

9999999 games in 1

[IMGG]*qph.is.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-c97c88f8b487cf49ad69cd931450cc8a[/IMGG]

A

Mr.Kickass said:
9999999 games in 1

[IMGG]*qph.is.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-c97c88f8b487cf49ad69cd931450cc8a[/IMGG]

LOL...

Religion

Along the same lines, in Class 6, one of my friends claimed that inter-species sex could lead to human-animal hybrid species

You should find this interesting Humanzee - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

This thread is full of funny lies.. :lol:

"Mera Bharat Mahan"

Boy to girl/Girl to boy: You're my first love.

Gandhi is the father of our Nation

Ok so this is not really a lie but it sounds so good that it can actually become a reality. Go on, click the spoiler if you want to read

Submitted by some random user

I'm watching my favorite show (Koffee With Karan

) on TV, when the phone rings.

There's an agitated lady on the phone.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone has not been working for...."
Me (interrupting) : "I think you have the wrong number"
Lady: "Oh! I'm sorry..."

and I hang up the phone. 3 seconds later, it rings again. It's the same lady.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone is not working..."
Me: "Ma'am, the number you are dialing is the wrong number!", and hang up the phone.

I return to the TV show. It's a juicy episode with Rakhee Savant, and she's *****ing about Kareena. And the phone rings again.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? Listen, don't play games with me, OK? I know this is the right number. Don't try to avoid me. Do you know who I am?"

I realized that this lady was not going to let me watch the show unless someone listened to her complaint.

Me: "Welcome to BSNL's automated fault booking service. To continue in English, press one."

beep

The lady had actually pressed the '1' on her dial pad. Interesting. I thought I'd have some fun.

Me: "To register a complaint, please press the last 5 digits of your Driving License number after the beep. BEEP"

I can hear the lady furiously rummaging through her bag looking for her Driving License. After a while

beep-beep-beep-beep-beep

She had actually found it pretty fast.

Me: "Because of all the SPAM we have been receiving, we will now perform a check to see if you are human. Please enter the result of 35 multiplied by 4 divided by 12"

I can hear the lady shouting out to someone in the background.

Lady: "Prakash, quick! What is 35 times 4 by 12?"
Prakash: "What? Why do you need that?"
Lady: "I'm registering a complaint for our dead phone"
Prakash (sounding somewhat confused): "But why would you need..."
Lady: "JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION"
Prakash: "err..it's...aaaa...elevent point....errr..."

beep-beep

The lady actually enters 1-1 on the dial pad.

Me: "Your complaint has been registered. Thank you for calling BSNL"

The lady sounds pleased. I can hear her speaking to "Prakash"

Lady: "I like BSNL. They have such a high tech system. They didn't even have to ask me for the number of our landline that is dead. Cool!

^^

Mr.Kickass said:
Ok so this is not really a lie but it sounds so good that it can actually become a reality. Go on, click the spoiler if you want to read

Submitted by some random user

I'm watching my favorite show (Koffee With Karan ) on TV, when the phone rings.

There's an agitated lady on the phone.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone has not been working for...."
Me (interrupting) : "I think you have the wrong number"
Lady: "Oh! I'm sorry..."

and I hang up the phone. 3 seconds later, it rings again. It's the same lady.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone is not working..."
Me: "Ma'am, the number you are dialing is the wrong number!", and hang up the phone.

I return to the TV show. It's a juicy episode with Rakhee Savant, and she's *****ing about Kareena. And the phone rings again.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? Listen, don't play games with me, OK? I know this is the right number. Don't try to avoid me. Do you know who I am?"

I realized that this lady was not going to let me watch the show unless someone listened to her complaint.

Me: "Welcome to BSNL's automated fault booking service. To continue in English, press one."

beep

The lady had actually pressed the '1' on her dial pad. Interesting. I thought I'd have some fun.

Me: "To register a complaint, please press the last 5 digits of your Driving License number after the beep. BEEP"

I can hear the lady furiously rummaging through her bag looking for her Driving License. After a while

beep-beep-beep-beep-beep

She had actually found it pretty fast.

Me: "Because of all the SPAM we have been receiving, we will now perform a check to see if you are human. Please enter the result of 35 multiplied by 4 divided by 12"

I can hear the lady shouting out to someone in the background.

Lady: "Prakash, quick! What is 35 times 4 by 12?"
Prakash: "What? Why do you need that?"
Lady: "I'm registering a complaint for our dead phone"
Prakash (sounding somewhat confused): "But why would you need..."
Lady: "JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION"
Prakash: "err..it's...aaaa...elevent point....errr..."

beep-beep

The lady actually enters 1-1 on the dial pad.

Me: "Your complaint has been registered. Thank you for calling BSNL"

The lady sounds pleased. I can hear her speaking to "Prakash"

Lady: "I like BSNL. They have such a high tech system. They didn't even have to ask me for the number of our landline that is dead. Cool!

This one is EPIC man :rofl:

Mr.Kickass said:
Ok so this is not really a lie but it sounds so good that it can actually become a reality. Go on, click the spoiler if you want to read

Submitted by some random user

I'm watching my favorite show (Koffee With Karan ) on TV, when the phone rings.

There's an agitated lady on the phone.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone has not been working for...."
Me (interrupting) : "I think you have the wrong number"
Lady: "Oh! I'm sorry..."

and I hang up the phone. 3 seconds later, it rings again. It's the same lady.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone is not working..."
Me: "Ma'am, the number you are dialing is the wrong number!", and hang up the phone.

I return to the TV show. It's a juicy episode with Rakhee Savant, and she's *****ing about Kareena. And the phone rings again.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? Listen, don't play games with me, OK? I know this is the right number. Don't try to avoid me. Do you know who I am?"

I realized that this lady was not going to let me watch the show unless someone listened to her complaint.

Me: "Welcome to BSNL's automated fault booking service. To continue in English, press one."

beep

The lady had actually pressed the '1' on her dial pad. Interesting. I thought I'd have some fun.

Me: "To register a complaint, please press the last 5 digits of your Driving License number after the beep. BEEP"

I can hear the lady furiously rummaging through her bag looking for her Driving License. After a while

beep-beep-beep-beep-beep

She had actually found it pretty fast.

Me: "Because of all the SPAM we have been receiving, we will now perform a check to see if you are human. Please enter the result of 35 multiplied by 4 divided by 12"

I can hear the lady shouting out to someone in the background.

Lady: "Prakash, quick! What is 35 times 4 by 12?"
Prakash: "What? Why do you need that?"
Lady: "I'm registering a complaint for our dead phone"
Prakash (sounding somewhat confused): "But why would you need..."
Lady: "JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION"
Prakash: "err..it's...aaaa...elevent point....errr..."

beep-beep

The lady actually enters 1-1 on the dial pad.

Me: "Your complaint has been registered. Thank you for calling BSNL"

The lady sounds pleased. I can hear her speaking to "Prakash"

Lady: "I like BSNL. They have such a high tech system. They didn't even have to ask me for the number of our landline that is dead. Cool!

ahahah man... Must have been a moment in life , to troll someone like that. Epic Troll.

Internet Explorer : Finds and displays information and websites on the internet.

Biggest lie ever said or heard:"I'm Fine"

I'll be there in five minutes

Mr.Kickass said:
Ok so this is not really a lie but it sounds so good that it can actually become a reality. Go on, click the spoiler if you want to read

Submitted by some random user

I'm watching my favorite show (Koffee With Karan ) on TV, when the phone rings.

There's an agitated lady on the phone.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone has not been working for...."
Me (interrupting) : "I think you have the wrong number"
Lady: "Oh! I'm sorry..."

and I hang up the phone. 3 seconds later, it rings again. It's the same lady.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone is not working..."
Me: "Ma'am, the number you are dialing is the wrong number!", and hang up the phone.

I return to the TV show. It's a juicy episode with Rakhee Savant, and she's *****ing about Kareena. And the phone rings again.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? Listen, don't play games with me, OK? I know this is the right number. Don't try to avoid me. Do you know who I am?"

I realized that this lady was not going to let me watch the show unless someone listened to her complaint.

Me: "Welcome to BSNL's automated fault booking service. To continue in English, press one."

beep

The lady had actually pressed the '1' on her dial pad. Interesting. I thought I'd have some fun.

Me: "To register a complaint, please press the last 5 digits of your Driving License number after the beep. BEEP"

I can hear the lady furiously rummaging through her bag looking for her Driving License. After a while

beep-beep-beep-beep-beep

She had actually found it pretty fast.

Me: "Because of all the SPAM we have been receiving, we will now perform a check to see if you are human. Please enter the result of 35 multiplied by 4 divided by 12"

I can hear the lady shouting out to someone in the background.

Lady: "Prakash, quick! What is 35 times 4 by 12?"
Prakash: "What? Why do you need that?"
Lady: "I'm registering a complaint for our dead phone"
Prakash (sounding somewhat confused): "But why would you need..."
Lady: "JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION"
Prakash: "err..it's...aaaa...elevent point....errr..."

beep-beep

The lady actually enters 1-1 on the dial pad.

Me: "Your complaint has been registered. Thank you for calling BSNL"

The lady sounds pleased. I can hear her speaking to "Prakash"

Lady: "I like BSNL. They have such a high tech system. They didn't even have to ask me for the number of our landline that is dead. Cool!

A real c***iya.

RCuber said:
"I will return the money"..

This.

Tension mat le, sab thik ho jayega is a lie encountered almost daily

I will call you tomorrow or next week.

I

IRCTC has improved..............................

ishan99 said:
IRCTC has improved..............................

It's really improved, dude.
Now, its not a lie..

I

Gearbox said:
It's really improved, dude.
Now, its not a lie..

hahahahhaa...

sushovan said:
" If India is a computer, Congress is its default programme.” - Guess who

Yeah like Internet explorer

ishan99 said:
IRCTC has improved..............................

Gearbox said:
It's really improved, dude.
Now, its not a lie..

Yeah. This was a genuine and pleasant surprise. Hope the site stays this way.
If any of you haven't tried IRCTC lately, check it out (during non-tatkal hours). It certainly is better, hope it is just a beginning in the right direction.

"Hindi is our national language"

Half Life 3

Consoles are better than PC

CommanderShawnzer said:
Consoles are better than PC

...and a list of 100 reasons explaining why

CommanderShawnzer said:
Consoles are better than PC

Don't start a war here. :mrgreen:

Gearbox said:
Don't start a war here.

The war was over before it started :mrgreen:

The last four posts make a paradox, considering they are lies (or otherwise)

S

My salary is 50k per month

Mac is better than PC

sandeep410 said:
My salary is 50k per month

So you're telling me it is impossible for you to meet people with 50k/m salaries?

S

Extreme Gamer said:
So you're telling me it is impossible for you to meet people with 50k/m salaries?

Point is not about the number. If you generally ask some1 thier salary 80% of time they would tell you a number like 40k when the actual number would be 20k. People always inflate their salary.

Nintendo Wii U is the best console

Work in progress or men at work

'Ok. I won't do it next time'.

I have read the terms and conditions

Saransh verma said:
I have read the terms and conditions

Like! !

CommanderShawnzer said:
Nintendo Wii U is the best console

It's the truth.

sandeep410 said:
Point is not about the number. If you generally ask some1 thier salary 80% of time they would tell you a number like 40k when the actual number would be 20k. People always inflate their salary.

This is the first time I'm hearing that.

H

私は毎日朝ご飯のためにnoobsを食べます。

Extreme Gamer said:
It's the truth.

*addicted-gamers.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/sad-3ds.jpg

S

Extreme Gamer said:
It's the truth.

This is the first time I'm hearing that.

Are you indian??

dead5 said:
私は毎日朝ご飯のためにnoobsを食べます。

*addicted-gamers.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/sad-3ds.jpg

I said that it is indeed the best console. 3DS has a bad analog stick. I don't like the analog stick on the 3DS.

And my assumption was that the domain was limited to home consoles.

A

Extreme Gamer said:
So you're telling me it is impossible for you to meet people with 50k/m salaries?

He was saying about dollar, not INR

OT: @Super Nintendo Fan~~boy~~ Bros. : Please start posting in them next gen console threads again.Its a llllllloooooooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggggggggg time since i've seen a good FlameWar :grin:

Btw i didn't think you guys would bite the bait

Another lie

RandomBangladeshiImmigrantWorker said:
Hum Kolkata shey hai

When someone asks, why're you late//
Just now i came..

Friend : kaha pe hai BC ??
Me( just getting up from sleep ) : bas aa gaya bhai..aadhe raste pe hu.. 5 min me aa jaunga

ashs1 said:
Friend : kaha pe hai BC ??
Me( just getting up from sleep ) : bas aa gaya bhai..aadhe raste pe hu.. 5 min me aa jaunga

Classic Lie.

Me : Kitna padke aaya
Friend : Kuch nhi padha
*images.wikia.com/spongebob/images/8/89/Later.jpg
Friend : Tujhe kitne marks aaye
Me : 7/10
Friend : Mujhe 10/10 aaye :grin:

Me: Par tune padha nhi tha na?

Friend : *i2.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/005/882/I%20lied.jpg

sandeep410 said:
Are you indian??

No, I'm an Antarctic living in the north pole.

CommanderShawnzer said:
OT: @Super Nintendo Fan~~boy~~ Bros. : Please start posting in them next gen console threads again.Its a llllllloooooooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggggggggg time since i've seen a good FlameWar
Btw i didn't think you guys would bite the bait

Another lie

Denied. Go home.

arijitsinha said:
He was saying about dollar, not INR

Saying of someone else "I earn 50k per month" without specifiying currency on an Indian forum implies the Indian currency. He should have been more specific

H

Extreme Gamer said:
I said that it is indeed the best console. 3DS has a bad analog stick. I don't like the analog stick on the 3DS.

And my assumption was that the domain was limited to home consoles.

The games define a console, not hardware. The 3DS has Etrian Odyssey, Pokemon, Fire Emblem, Shin Megami Tensei etc. The Wii U has The Wonderful 101 and Pikmin.

The Wii U may end up better than the 3DS in the future, but as of now it isn't.

Oh.. not again!!
Chill guys, thread is about 'biggest lie', not 'biggest fight'...

S

I am talking about INR and not Dollars

dead5 said:
The games define a console, not hardware. The 3DS has Etrian Odyssey, Pokemon, Fire Emblem, Shin Megami Tensei etc. The Wii U has The Wonderful 101 and Pikmin.

The Wii U may end up better than the 3DS in the future, but as of now it isn't.

this is a biggest lie thread...

sandeep410 said:
I am talking about INR and not Dollars

see arijit? I knew I was talking to sandeep in the right contex.

A

sandeep410 said:
I am talking about INR and not Dollars

Ohkay..

sandeep410 said:
I am talking about INR and not Dollars

Ohkay..

OT: People do get more salary.. once I thought my friend got 30K .. turns out he was getting 75K .. :/ also in profession, people don't disclose their salary (other than for friends)

S

RCuber said:
OT: People do get more salary.. once I thought my friend got 30K .. turns out he was getting 75K .. :/ also in profession, people don't disclose their salary (other than for friends)

You thought your friend was making 30k he didnt told you that he was making 30k.
Of course there are people who make 50k or 2l or 5l i am not saying its not possible to make that kind of money.lot of ppl disclose their salary even if you dont ask them and most of the time they inflate it.

When ppl ask my sis where she works she tells oh i work in TCS and my salary is 30k/m
she brings home 10k
Other day i was in my friends house and his father was yelling at him.
He points figer at me and tells him to his son learn from his sis. Shes 2 years younger than you and shes working in TCS earning 30k per month and yous salary is still only 18k. If you would have listened to me and actually studied and got good marks you would have been TCS now making 50k by now. :facepalm:

My other friend was working in abudhabhi. He shows me a picture of good bungalow and tells me that company gave him to stay there alone. He also shows pic of audi car and him driving audi car and said company gave him as a gift. He also mentions his salary is 2L and His life is really cool there.

Now coincidentally my other friend was in the same bungalow and working with my friend. I got to know the truth from him.
House had some 30 people crammed in it. Car belonged to company and not any1 else and it was provided to make to and fro to the company. He told both of theirs salary was only 45k.

HowStuffWorks "10 of the Biggest Lies in History"

R

This movie is inspired by a real event. :rofl:

Mr.Kickass said:
Ok so this is not really a lie but it sounds so good that it can actually become a reality. Go on, click the spoiler if you want to read

Submitted by some random user

I'm watching my favorite show (Koffee With Karan ) on TV, when the phone rings.

There's an agitated lady on the phone.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone has not been working for...."
Me (interrupting) : "I think you have the wrong number"
Lady: "Oh! I'm sorry..."

and I hang up the phone. 3 seconds later, it rings again. It's the same lady.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? My phone is not working..."
Me: "Ma'am, the number you are dialing is the wrong number!", and hang up the phone.

I return to the TV show. It's a juicy episode with Rakhee Savant, and she's *****ing about Kareena. And the phone rings again.

Lady: "Hello? BSNL? Listen, don't play games with me, OK? I know this is the right number. Don't try to avoid me. Do you know who I am?"

I realized that this lady was not going to let me watch the show unless someone listened to her complaint.

Me: "Welcome to BSNL's automated fault booking service. To continue in English, press one."

beep

The lady had actually pressed the '1' on her dial pad. Interesting. I thought I'd have some fun.

Me: "To register a complaint, please press the last 5 digits of your Driving License number after the beep. BEEP"

I can hear the lady furiously rummaging through her bag looking for her Driving License. After a while

beep-beep-beep-beep-beep

She had actually found it pretty fast.

Me: "Because of all the SPAM we have been receiving, we will now perform a check to see if you are human. Please enter the result of 35 multiplied by 4 divided by 12"

I can hear the lady shouting out to someone in the background.

Lady: "Prakash, quick! What is 35 times 4 by 12?"
Prakash: "What? Why do you need that?"
Lady: "I'm registering a complaint for our dead phone"
Prakash (sounding somewhat confused): "But why would you need..."
Lady: "JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION"
Prakash: "err..it's...aaaa...elevent point....errr..."

beep-beep

The lady actually enters 1-1 on the dial pad.

Me: "Your complaint has been registered. Thank you for calling BSNL"

The lady sounds pleased. I can hear her speaking to "Prakash"

Lady: "I like BSNL. They have such a high tech system. They didn't even have to ask me for the number of our landline that is dead. Cool!

Epic!

ASHISH65 said:
Epic!

how did I missed this post hilarious it should be in dumbest thread

Your a fgt

^yu mke me cri everitim

Me 2 crid

This happened when I was in second grade.

Teacher:- Mt. Everest is the highest peak in the world.
My Partner:- You know last summer I am my parents went on a trip to Mt. Everest on car and you know it was like above the clouds so my parents went for a walk down to the cloud level.

This one happened last summer.
Me:- So what proccy do you have in your desktop?
My friend:- Ah my uncle got me a brand new core i3 from USA, you know it's a Special Edition. CORE i3 OCTA CORE.
I was like ROFL.

Android doesn't lag.

whatthefrak said:
Android doesn't lag.

My G2 doesn't.

There you go